• Serrated neck
  • This one was a short sharp shock just before morning. I watched as my soldiers cut the throats of our hostages. I was appalled, they were simply slicing across the neck rather than cutting into the meat. A hostage stood in front of me, wide eyed and terrified, clothes in rags, hands bound. I spun on my heel and drove my blade several inches into his neck. His eyes popped wide in horror. I started to cleave the neck and sawed though the tendons. I gripped the dagger firmly in my fist and plunged it through his main artery. A squirt of blood exploded in a crimson arc about five feet in diameter and soaked me. The head lolled back. He fell to his knees and toppled forward. I wiped the blade on my uniform and marched along the flanks. Everywhere was blood.
  • I was talking about a similar though less graphic scene last night in the pub. Apparently my subconscious decided it could do better and expanded on the theme.
• The plane ramp
  • I was driving from nose to tail across the top of an aeroplane which was lined with tarmacadam. The jump I first did at normal speed in an uber-suped up Suberu (blue with flamey designs). I'd start on the nose of the plan and wait until it was a certain distance passed a floating sky city which was acting as my landing spot. The plane flying away from this spot meant that timing in the launch was paramount. I flew up from the lip of the plane kicker at tremendous speed and gathered height immediatly. Distance was more difficult but leaning forward in the car straightened the nose and allowed me to glide over the landing and screech to a halt. I repeated this several times, each time disappointed that I hadn't gone as fast and as far as I thought I was capable of. So on my last attempt I waited, reving the engine with the car in neutral and waited some more. We were then a mammoth distance from the landing spot and I released, wheelspinned and floored the accelerator. The car lurched off at break neck speed. Half way toward the end of the plane (flying road really) I spun out of control for a few seconds and wiped off a lot of speed. I decided to keep going but I was off centre for the kicker and on reaching the edge I jumped out of the car and it fell straight down. I rolled on the edge of the ramp and thoughts rushed through my mind. The parachute was attached to the car, I had no chute myself, I was on top of an aeroplane 50000 metres up. I dived off the edge after the car ... and woke up.
  • Wow, what a ride. I clung to the remnants of the dream as I woke and tried to keep it in the forefront of my mind. When I fell back to sleep the tarmacadam on the plane had been covered with a good five foot of snow and I hit the moving kicker for the rest of the night on my snowboard. The metaphor had been replaced by the reality, I went big :)
• Ollyphants and suicidal whales
  • Myself and my coherts were embarking on a war. The kind of war befitting a subliminal LOTR ripoff :) My plan was to get two elephants and lash them together side by side. This we did to over a hundred elephants. We then constructed mechanical jaws and an African tribal mask style face to hang between each pair. The elephants' heads and tusks faced left and right respectively and this new head became the face the enemy would see. It was collosal. The newly constructed beast was an eight legged, three headed abomination resplendent with six sets of tusks and a moveable front jaw like the bucket of a JCB digger. We rode on its back and charged through the field killing everything within a tripple head swinging radius. Magick. After the war, time moved very quickly and eons passed. I was sitting one eyed behind a large mohogany desk in a tall skyscraper. I was wearing a full general's uniform, blue and staring at some reports spread out on the desk. Behind me the wall was a two way mirror overlooking the city far below. A killer whale fell past the window. It took several minutes for the whale to pass the window from head to tail and subsequently splash onto the road beneath. Wave after wave of blubber swelled up and flooded through the city's arteries. I barely glanced up, we were still experimenting on harnessing nature's power mechanically. We had come a long way from lashing pachaderms together with ropes but still hadn't quite managed to make killer whales sustain open air flight for more than a period of seconds.
  • Right, ok then. Big elephants eh? Later on I was snowboarding through some fresh powder and ended up face down in a mountain so it was business as usual. As to the earlier stages of the dream however I really don't know, eh I like elephants?
• Nutter with a mug
  • this dream had ended with a guy crawling over bodies beating them with the butt of a gun, I took it from him, he asked for it back so he could kill himself but I wouldn't let him waste the bullet. So I gave him a yellow mug which he smashed on the ground and then cut across the top of his head and down the side of his face with the serrated shard. His forehead flapped against his chin and he grinned so I finished him with the handle of the gun.
  • I woke up with one off my eyes blood red, having nearly poked it out in my sleep. People wonder about whether they dream in black and white or colour, i dream in semi reality. It tends to be rgb colour though.
• Attack by DellPLUS
  • I was married in this one. I've no idea who to but I had two kids and a home. DellPLUS (my old department in Dell) arrived every day in pickup trucks with sticks and crowbars and shit and started tearing apart my house. I was trying to protect the children and shouting out the windows at them with an iron bar in my hand.
  • another good example of semi reality. I was found by my then flat mate belting the baseball bat off the couch in the sitting room and screaming out the window at nearby construction workers... oops
• Voluntary Suicide Pill
  • in this dream I had agreed to take the voluntary suicide pill in order to quit work in Dell. Various different members of the group at work also agreed to take it themselves. At my age it really seemed like the correct thing to do. On Thursday I changed my mind but the paperwork had already gone through and I was to take the pill that Saturday. Fortunately another in the group had decided he would take it and we swapped. He had a wife and children to support so suicide seemed like the healthy option.
  • easy one this. I had just taken the Voluntary Separation Program at Dell and was finding it difficult to get a job thereafter. What was interesting, however, was the proliferation of the VSP acronym proving that my subconscious had spent far too long in Dell's corporate environment as it was :)
• The suicide stamp
  • an invention in a dream. This often occurs, shame it's nothing of practical use. The stamp is the kind of mechanical ink-paper thump-thump style. The base is in an arc with two "legs" and a space between. One inserts the wrist, palm up, under this arc. The other hand is use to slam the handle above. This in turn drives a cross shaped series of blades into the wrist. The short part of the cross is made of twin razors a millimetre apart which punch into the wrist at right angles to the arm finding the artery. The main action, however, is in the form of five blades again a millimetre apart. These punch through along the length of the forearm finding and shredding the artery. In the dream I was demonstrating this to an audience of potential clients. The blades were all sterilised prior to use and good for one use only. The demonstration was a complete success with one obvious drawback, I woke up after it.
  • yes I know, nasty trend developing here. The millimetre space insures that the resulting wound cannot be stitched or repaired. The fact that the main cutting action is along rather than across the artery means that it is opened effectively and kills quickly. Of course it would have been more useful if it were impossible for one to use the device on another, thereby proving suicide without question. You know like punching your own fist through your head.
• Hovercraft
  • this dream started in my subconscious's subconscious. Me and the other superheroes (stop that, we're all the heroes of our own stories) were hanging out in my subconscious. Suddenly a fat bloke wearing a turban and gold baggy MC Hammer pants burst in face first screaming for help. I recognised him immediately as the Emperor, my charge at that time. Naturally I went to help. I drew a barbed sword of flames 10 foot long from nowhere and leapt to action. I found myself curiously confronted with Sean Connery and a bloody big sword on him also. "You old bastard", I exclaimed as we were of course old friends, "what the hell are you doing attacking my charge?" "My dear boy I'm sorry I didn't realise", came the reply, "But he called me a devious backstabbing layabout." "But you are...", "That's as may well be but you don't hear me calling him a fat pompous oaf, now do you? Some things are just not done." I looked out the window at the other hovercrafts, all bright white on a dark blue sea. One, single seater police issue, passed under us as I was talking. Then I noticed a girl out in the garden and went to investigate having forgotten all about Sean and the Emperor. When I arrived through the vines and tangles and meet her she was enchanting, a beauty the like of which the world had never known. I told her so and bade of her her name. I can't remember her name but she was Sean's sister. (hmmm, that sounds familiar...) She said I could not touch her because of the tentacals and scabs on her hands but I saw none. We had to go on a trip to get the King. Off with us in the hovercraft upriver. We passed by another craft on its way downriver and stopped it to ask questions. They didn't speak English but spoke a strange dialect which was a mixture of sed and SQL. "'s/prince+1/dead/g' from palace", he said. "Ah, the king is dead, I think. Why can't I just su to him, take over his ship, find out what he knows and kill him?", but Sean's sister said "No, that was the old way. Where we're going there can be no more random senseless violence". "Fair enough", I said and offered to sell my livery stables and buy the hovercraft from the Emperor. He said he wanted to be paid in bull's sweat. I told him I could give him enough bull's sweat to drown himself in! Then I woke up.
  • The narrator/oratory style of this dream has not been added post dream but was actually an integral part of the dream. Very strange one this. It's a pity I didn't get to take it to its conclusion. I presume the King didn't make it. The bit where I looked out and saw all the hovercraft was fantastic though. There were hundreds of them all different sizes. I could see practically a schematic of the ones that came up close to ours, as they passed.
• Revolving bridge
  • it started out badly, I was playing God. My mother was younger than me and had taken something of mine. Can't remember what but I wanted it back. She was about six and I, about 13. We were in Killeshandra, Cavan at my grandparents house. I had an amazing microphone/amp jobbie which projected my voice around the world. So I went outside and used it. "This is God, the world will end tomorrow...". Unfortunetly I was interrupted and didn't get to finish the sentence. Mum went running up to bed crying and the world generally panicked. I ran back into the house to see what was up and my father told me that she was very upset. I went upstairs to explain but dad stopped me and said nothing I could do would make it any better. I knew I could though. So away with me up and told her that God was going to finish "If Joan (mum) doesn't give that thing back to Stephen". So she returned the item and all was well.
    The second portion of the dream started with a revolving road. It was basically cylindrical and cut into eight cross-sections. Each revolved alternately, clockwise then anti-clockwise. It was suspended in space and my view panned around watching the traffic fall off either end. A car would start in the centre and begin travelling along the apex. The revolving section it was on would move it out of the way of oncoming traffic. This movement combined with the forward motion of the car created a diagonal vecter. When it reached the ajoining scection, revolving in the opposite direction, it would be realigned with its original path. There were hundreds of cars following complex patterns along this route in either direction zig-zagging through space before eventually dropping off the far edge into the void. The pattern got quite complex but I was able to zoom in and watch the motion of individual cars with ease and the whole thing seemed like a brilliant system.
  • The mother thing I think is indicative of an ongoing disagreement. Misunderstandings left too long type of thing. "If only I could explain", you know, that kind of shit. I created an simple avi to demonstrate the movement of one vehicle... It's a meg though so might not be worth downloading depending on your connection.
• dropping plates
  • I started this dream chasing some girl. She was running and I was in a car. To be precise a red convertible Cadillac style car. She jumped into the mouth of a volcano and I followed. She spun on the way down and landed on a ledge, well like a stalagmite with a flat surface, a plateaux surrounded by magma. I was hurtling down engine first and stopped mid air two foot from crashing into her face. My view then swung out from the driver seat to circle the car. When my perspective had completed almost 360^o, the car continued falling. It smashed through her head and I was engulfed in a molten rock explosion. Later in the dream I was following a young boy in third person shooter perspective. I think the boy was me. Anyway he/me ran out through his house and into a green area behind it. At that point housewives, standard stereotype old Dublin style - bandanas, floral aprons, curlers, fat and carrying rolling pins, came out of every house in the estate. Each came through a small door in a long wall which circumferenced the green. They each had a stack of white dinner plates. They started frisbee-throwing these at me in a hail. All the while shouting "get out you fucking hacker!! get out!".
  • There was an actual plot to this dream. I remember there being continuity but alas I can't recall exactly what that plot was. Often this is the case so I've simply described the pertinent events. I can think of several quite logical albeit highly derogatory reasons behind this dream. Perhaps it's unresolved issues with women, though I really don't think I have any of them. Hmmm, maybe it was the cheese sandwich and half bottle of whiskey I had just before bed.
• Ahab
  • This one started with a botched assassination attempt by yours truly, well I think it was me. Anyway, again chasing some girl (hmmm) through an icy forest. I shot at her with a bow and arrow using a 5 foot spear wrapped in cloth of some sort as the arrow. This thundered home through a fur coat being worn by someone standing in front of her. Blood spread on the coat and the wrong body dropped to the snow. She ran. I decided the only way to kill her now was shoot her with a blow pipe in India. So I ran to where I knew a whale lived. The whale had arms and a beard and was sitting just in the water with a pot belly hanging out over floating ice. It was eating grey stuff from a plate in front of it. I ran across a path of hot coals in bare feet to get to the whale and leapt into its mouth. I had to force open the epiglottis to get down its throat. I swam quite fast through miles of inner chambers almost getting crushed by the whale's internal movements. I then came to a tunnel filled with grabbing arms ^TM. They reached and grabbed for me. The arms belonged to the mewlers. She caught me as I fell and asked why I hadn't brought anything to hold on with. She was climbing up the chamber by digging the spikes on a dumb-bell into the chamber walls. Just then someone came out from between the mewlers and said "Hey go easy with that spike there are people here". The spiked dumb-bell was sticking out of his chest. She apologised and we continued our assent. She explained to me that the mewlers were actually people who thought they were in Heaven. They climb into the whale and lodge themselves into it's digestive tract. There they are slowly digested by the whale but after the first three years they become used to the steady slow pain of this. They loose all their senses after a while and that's why they grab at anything that passes, not knowing if they have touched it or not. They feed themselves on what they catch. They are surrounded by warmth and food in plentiful supplies and are always aware of the whale god surrounding them at all times. Those that do not adjust in this way are chained to the inner cartilage and strain against iron until they die and the shackles reused for the next dissident. The whale put another armful of grey stuff into its mouth and swallowed. Arms came out from every wall grabbing and eating. I reached out and grabbed the woman by the throat and stabbed my thumbs through her neck. I tightened my fists around the neck muscles and ripped them out shattering her jaw. Then I grabbed the throat and ripped it out. I knocked out a section of her spine and reached in to stick my fingers through the stem of her brain. I lit a cigarette. The whale farted. The methane ignited. I woke up.
  • I had several distinct dreams last night this was the one I remembered. I did have a knife in a previous one which had a release and locking mechanism. But when I was shown the instructions I woke up. I find it impossible to read in dreams. I think it's probably because your subconscious doesn't think in language, just images and electrical pulses. So when my sub was trying to translate these images into writing and then read it back and translate it into images again it kept messing up. The words kept changing and it decided I'd better wake up and deal with it myself. As regards this dream I was watching End of Days before I went to bed. The concept of the whale as both Heaven for the mewlers and Hell for the dissidents was my sub dealing with the religious concept of the film. Chasing the girl was, well that was the entire plot of the film, Satan chasing a girl all over the place and Arnie trying to stop him. The whale itself was similar in appearance to the bad guy, "Done", from Maxx which I was also watching yesterday. The grabbing arms are from labyrinth. Not really much originality but an interesting interpretation of yesterday's events...
• Buzzin and hornets
  • I held out a hornet in my left hand and a wasp in my right. Both were about 3/4 of and inch long and buzzing. The hornet got away and flew straight from my left hand into my right ear and buzzed frantically in there. I freaked out and tried to push it out with my finger but it seemed to be tunnelling in further and getting louder and louder. I knew a hornet could kill over 30 bees a day so it was extremely alarming. I woke up with a start and could still hear the buzzing. As I raised my head off the pillow a fly fell out of my right ear and walked very slowly across my pillow. I slammed my hand down on it, brushed it away and went back to sleep.
  • This has been another installment of semi-reality dreaming, I hope you enjoyed it more than I did...
• Last night
  • zzzz