Ali: I is here wid none udder than the women who starred in 57 passengers in a plane wid a blackman wid a gun and International man of stupidness Austin Powerless Liz Hurley
Ali: Good afternoon
Liz: Afternoon
Ali: Now Liz you is a bigtime porn star is you no?
Liz: No I am not
Ali: But is not you da one that did suck off Hugh Grant in the back
of the car.
Liz: No it was not
Ali: So you is denying it then
Liz: Denying what
Ali: Getting your gums around Hughes plums
Liz: Well I can't really deny it because he is actually my boyfriend
Ali: So let me get this right you suck him off because you didn't want
to let off the punani but you was bored of the house so you did it in the
car?
Liz: No it wasn't me it was a prostitute
Ali: and you was watching yes?
Liz: No I found out about it in the press
Ali: Did you pay for the prostitute as a present for him because
you'd been to the dentist and the painters was in?
Liz: NO! Hugh had his reasons for doing what he done, he said sorry
and he is now behaving himself
Ali: But is it true that he has been married 4 times and died once all
in 2 and a half hours?
Liz: No that was the film that made him famous, it was called 4 weddings
and a funeral.
Ali: Now I 's have never met him personally but no disrespect true he's
your boyfriend and all that plus he pays for it which must be cool for
you especially when the pennies are low - but I heard he is minging.
Liz: What's minging
Ali: You know - not saying much, ugly as a women sumo wid a beard
Liz: No No No Hugh is very charming
Ali: He can't be that charming
Liz: Why
Ali: Well I know I is not that charming but I've never had to pay for
punani except for the time I had to take me Julie to Kentucky because
she can't do it on a empty stomach.
Liz: What is Punani, is it some type of food
Ali; Fi reel.
Liz: Well
Ali: You can describe it like that but you would have to tell people
not to chew it cos dat could be painful and if I was hungrey and you offered
me your punani I would be a lucky man
Liz: Is it an exotic fruit
Ali: Not really although the exotic ones can be better, anyway getting
back to you. You was famous once no?
Liz: Well I would like to still be considered famous I hope
Ali: Yeah but you was famous for that dress yes!
Liz: Which one - There's been quite a few
Ali: The one where you was accepting the music award, the one wid the
union jack all over it.
Liz: I don't own a union jack dress
Ali: C'mon Liz the whole world saw you drop the melons on telly
Liz: You have me confused with someone else
Ali: You is not in the spice girls?
Liz: NO!
Ali: Why not
Liz: I'm just not
Ali: But didn't they kick out Geri so you could step in
Liz: No they did not and anyway I cannot sing
Ali: don't matter at least it don't seem that way
Liz: I am not in the spice girls, although I do like their music
Ali: Anyway I muss say thank you to the one like Liz for her time and
let you people know that it is OK for you to pay for
your boyfriend to be sucked off in the back of the car and you can
get famous for wearing dresses that don't fit and that the
spice girls can't sing.
This is Ali Gee bringing you the flavour straight from Liz Hurley
Punani -
Nuff respect