New State Prison The Government has just revealed plans for a new state prison. It's sole purpose will be to accomadate the prisoners of the forseen convictions following the revelations of the Flood report. "It's just disgraceful", said one politition about the current facilities available. "Poor ould Leeeeeem Laaaaawlor was forced to share a disgusting prison building with the other riff-raff. He didn't serve his country to get this kind of shabby treatment you know." The new facility, rumoured to be located somewhere in abbotstown will have it's own luas line to facilitate day releases for good behaviour (presumably when a disgraced TD stops talking in rhetoric), Satelite TV (to watch the Ireland games), a bar (somewhere to strike up new deals for after their short stay in the prison) and a live link up to the Dáil (not that half of them will bother watching anyway). In fact, the prison will be an exact replica of the Dáil, so it'll be like they never went away.

How a typical state prison bedroom will look Apparantly the feasablility study is yet to take place. It is currently awaiting the results of a feasability study.